Selfishness & Selflessness

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All act are both selfishness and selflessness.
The fundamental principal is the same for selfishness and selflessness.
The only difference between these two words is the observing object (reference object)

'An act of selfishness to one is an act of selflessness to other, and in the converse, an act of selflessness to one is an act of selfishness to other.'

Example,
Case A
2 families members were on an expedition trip. During the trip, snowstorm occurred. They sought for a shelter and found a cave. After days passed, food of family A ran out but the weather haven't turned well. Family B got four members and two biscuits. Mother of family B wanted their two children to have it. However, father of family B insisted to give one to family A. Then, an argument broke out.

In this case, the beneficial party of decision of mother B is their children. Her decision is considered to be selfless to her children but selfish to father B and family A. In the contrast, the beneficial party of decision of father B is family A (although family B still has one biscuit, their having would be deduced from two to one) His decision is considered to be selfless to family A but selfish to his other family members (to act without considering their children).

Case B,

'Observing object is not limited to human being. It could be other living beings or even a thought, religion, and so on.'

In the ancient days, sacrifices were offered to God. In village A, people were arguing about who would offer his goat to their God. Farmer A volunteered to make the offering. All villagers were happy.

In this case, the beneficial party is their religion and whole community. Hence his act is selfless to them. However, what about the pity goat? His act is selfish to the goat because he took its innocent life. Goat might think that "Why not offered your life instead of mine, your God might be more willingly to accept it."

Despite of these two cases, you may examine any other cases from various point of views. You may find that every act involves gaining and losing of various party. The losing party would always consist the act to be selfish while the winning party would always consist the act to be selfless.

Case C,
In the same scenario with Case B, if farmer A offered his own life instead of his goat, was he selfless?

Depending on observing object, it cannot be concluded as selfless. His act would be selfless to his community and his goat but might not be selfless to his family or even himself. If he believed in his God and believed God would bring him to a better place other than Earth, his act was considered to be selfish to himself. Besides, by leaving behind his responsibility as a father of a his family and a child of his mother, without considering their emotions and lives without him, his act was selfish to them.

In addition,

'If a person act in his own will, his act is always considered selfish.'

Regardless of how many effort an action taker spent and how many people are benefited by his act, as long as you takes the action taker as the observing object, his act is always selfish to himself because he acts in his own interest (his own will)

Hence,

'Never should anyone deny being selfish, because everyone is'

However, remind you that there are different depth of selfishness. In my personal point of view, it would be always better if you spending more effort in actions that would benefit more involved parties other than you alone.

In conclusion,

'No one should argue or judge an act to be selfish or selfless. However, one could argue about who would be the beneficial party.'

Broadly usage of selfishness and selflessness
Selfishness - the action taker is one of the beneficial party/parties
Selflessness - the action taker is not one of the beneficial party/parties